Happiness

Happiness

“It found me when I felt I had to walk miles and Climb Mountains to get it. All this while it existed so close to me that I had no clue about it. I was all busy chasing my perceived version of happiness and I had lost myself entirely while doing that. Perhaps I enjoyed the pursuing and the directionless search out of some insanity, but never realized when it had crossed the limit of being my passion and was turning into an obsession, and gradually a burden or may be a low level of depression.

And now I just find myself still, welcoming the natural and unforced set up of my new original happiness. Happiness inside me.” She had a wide grin on her face and a grateful sparkle in her eyes.

After the therapy session, Vipra opened her eyes and shared her unique experience with her new best friend and her life coach Dr. Khan.

She looked into the mirror and could feel her own dazzling energy around herself. For few minutes everything remained silent, and it felt better that way to everyone present in the room.

“ I owe many thanks to you, and have no words to express them. It was like finding a giant tree to hug, lean on and rest under its shadow after being tired running for years,” her satisfaction was evident in her words.

Vipra had been into an unusual kind of depression and emotional traumas which she herself hadn’t recognized from past 10 years. The multiple unsuccessful love relationship had taken a toll on her sentiments. Being a positive thinker and a fighter she always believed in moving on and never giving up on love. This enormous optimism had practically helped her to get accustomed to the post heart breaks and the healing process. Forgiving, forgetting and reconciling seemed right tools for her when each time she gambled with her feelings. It hurt a great deal but she kind of enjoyed the pain too. It was a melancholic state which she found comfortable to deal with.

For years, her professional success and family support kept her strong. These sides of life were sailing so stably that taking care of any other didn’t seem necessary at all. In fact none of the other sides seemed damaged, they just appeared difficult on the surface for a while and then she would naturally take care of it in her own way.

However all of that which was growing in the unknown abundant corner was ignored by her.

Vipra had no clue that her ‘never say die attitude’ had let her not realize her own wounds. She needed to see them, accept them and stop repeating her actions which caused them. Her attempt of self-healing or positive thinking wasn’t proving wrong, but ignoring so much of her own sentiments in the entire process was slowly damaging her strongest walls inside.

Vipra’s confusion between how much to give unconditionally, how much to love without expectations based on her spiritual beliefs; would often clash with the rationality of real life. She was fearless, open and lively in most of her romantic encounters. They started off well, brought a lot of joyous time to both the partners,  learnt and explored. While living that way she had said a lot of ‘No’s to her self-love. Her inner self kept dying with every step she took towards pleasing someone else. She didn’t even realize where empathizing had ended and ‘take me for a granted’ phase had started.

After being highly disturbed for a while and experiencing the impact of her brokenness on her self-confidence, she slowly sensed that there was something wrong in her life. Her unconscious always kept telling her something, which she couldn’t hear. The effect was slowly seen on her high energy in her work and personal life. There always seemed to be something unsettling which she could never point out.

She survived in that state for several years until she met her new life coach by Coincidence. Dr. Khan happened to be a life coach at her new organization. She met him during one of his one to one coaching sessions with another client. She happened to overhear the therapeutic discussion while using the cooler at the corner of a foyer of her department.

After a few unplanned conversations with Dr. Khan, made Vipra felt a bit secured in life. Suddenly the anxiety was diminishing and she just became a bit relaxed. This motivated her to move forward and formally ask for his help.

Dr. Khan being a genius in psychiatry, motivation, numerology, mythology and other expert areas naturally helped identifying her inner fears, she was astonished to find the accuracy in his analysis of her life without sharing a single detail on her own.

His unconventional psychiatric sessions were beautiful and insightful. He helped her find her own talents and gifts with the help of numerology, mythological analogies, life stories, and his liberal approach of consulting. Gradually she was healing.

The formal sessions began on daily basis, and today here she was in her second last session, feeling more poised, calm and sorted. It was as if nothing was going to take away her inner strength and newly found self-worth ever from her.

Dr. Khan replied to her appreciation, “ I am glad I could help, but you don’t have to thank me. This has become the purpose of my life. And it surely seems like a professional duty but deep inside it’s my real goal of being alive. So I would in fact thank you for helping me getting closer to that goal. This brings happiness to me.”

Vipra was overwhelmed and had no words to thank him enough, she just remembered his memorable first words of their first session “So Vipra, are you ready to find the real happiness this year?”

She was glad that she had got up from her desk, went near the cooler and overheard this master speaking of all the wisdom that day. She knew she had found her way at that moment and this time she didn’t ignore her intuition!